Haute Hockey: The NHL’s Best and Worst Dressed List
Posted on April 12, 2012 by Lena & Jules
The Stanley Cup Capades are in full swing and guaranteed to bring out the referees and the fashion police. While some hockey pros are front and center at Fashion Week, others dress like victims of a 1980s prairie province time warp. Sure, players are paid to put the puck in the net, not walk a runway but a tad of personal style doesn’t hurt. Some NHL stars prove that it is possible to go to work wearing shorts bigger than adult diapers and taped-up wool knee socks but still walk out of the arena with swagger.
For some reason we can watch a team of players skate for an entire season, but only after a glimpse of them in street clothes can we remember their name. This must have something to do with the female people watching reflex being deactivated by sports jerseys. As the playoffs roll on, join us in following all the characters and their garb on and off the ice. Here are our picks for this year’s best and worst dressed:
Kevin Bieksa, Vancouver Canucks
While usually unshaven, Kevin fits naturally into the black-on-black Reservoir Dogs look that is both edgy and classic. This Canucks defender is as gangster as you can get for a white boy from Ontario. Now if his team remembers to stop goals as well as Bieksa dresses, Vancouver can hopefully avoid riots this summer.
Don Cherry, CBC
Think what you will of this outspoken legend, he owns his style and his opinions and never looks back. We’d love to take Don shopping in Brooklyn, the motherland of old-school suits.
Henrik Lundqvist, New York Rangers
Maybe it’s because he’s from Sweden that Henrik Lundqvist can pull off a bow tie, a skinny tie or even a scarf. Lundqvist owns the glamor garb, but stays natural with his stubble and unruly hockey hair. Now that he’s a father to be, Hank will be the most sought after manny in town.
Sidney Crosby, Pittsburgh Penguins
We are granting Sid the Kid a “temp-insan” pass for some questionable facial hair decisions early in the year. Pubestache aside, Sidney looks fierce in a suit. This “Great One” in the making is well on his way to both hockey legend and style icon.
John Tortorella, New York Rangers Coach
Torts opts for a simple, classic style and unlike many other suits behind the boards, he is consistently well put together. We’ll admit he’s got a few bad ties in the closet, but we’d never say that to his face because the man is scary when he gets pissed – not to mention that rumor about ties to the mafia.
Alex Ovechkin, Washington Capitals
We can’t get enough of Russia’s greatest love machine on the ice, but in street clothes he’s got some work to do. His signature black graphic print tank with an enormous gold chain deserves a suspension. We’d even over look the missing front tooth if he would just take off those flip flops.
NHL Medical Staff
When there is an injury during the game, out march a brigade of men in khaki pants and dress shoes – the absolute wrong thing to wear on ice. After kneeling by the side of the player they emerge with wet spots on their knees and then have to hold onto the stretcher for dear life for fear of falling. We have enough concussions in hockey already guys, let’s get you into some athletic gear and why not some shoes that you can actually stand on.
Force and Scully energized fandom last season with their green bodysuits and antics in the face of the opposing team. Copycats have sprung up in every city and in every color, but the originals still rule. All the fakers out there should come up with another release for their spandex fetish.
Claude Julien, Boston Bruins Coach
Coach frump-o-potamus of the Boston Bruins looks like he should be working at the DMV and not leading one of the best teams in the NHL. Brown-on-brown tight fitting polyesters are not inspiring us Claude. You have a team of champs, start dressing like one yourself.
Carey Price, Montreal Canadiens
After a pitiful season, Carey’s Montreal Canadiens will not be in the playoffs this year. Even more tragic were the recent sitings of Price dressed like a cross between Garth Brooks and Zorro. This star goalie’s attempt at cowboy chic is long overdue for intervention. Let’s hope he uses the extra time off to consider a wardrobe update.
UP NEXT: Live Broadcasts by Lena & Jules
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