Our men are not professional athletes but treat co-ed ball hockey with the same intensity as the Stanley Cup Playoffs. They have even been known to refuse a game day booty call for fear of us “stealing their power”. We don’t know whether to laugh or cry that they play co-ed ball hockey to start with, but that’s another blog post. Until Kevin Bieksa accepts our offer to help clarify the official rule on game day sex, we’ll have to put up with the multiple personalities of our own men. See where yours fits in:
This guy starts out tough with some theory about waiting until after the game but then caves in about two seconds after you take off your top. During sex, he keeps talking about the game and how he shouldn’t be doing it – while proceeding to love every minute of it.
The Mean No Sex Machine
The ultimate playoff champ, flat out says no despite his urges. Lack of sex has made him so angry he won’t even talk to his own teammates and the only banging he can think about involves another player and the boards. Count on him spending some time in the penalty box until he gets some quality time in yours.
This is a man who will agree to sex and then after winning the game wants more sex to celebrate. You might as well just wear lingerie for the entire playoff season to keep up with this one. Not the worst problem to have.
Don’t even try to rub his neck, much less show some cleavage – it won’t work. The Untouchable has superior self control, refusing all sexual activity on game day only because he knows it will only lead to more sex for him after the playoffs. Admit it, when he says no, you just want it more.
The Risky Businessman
This guy gets his game on in every way. Even just hours before the game he gets creative with positions and may even get freaky with some new toys. One false move could put this high risk horn dog on the injured list so persuade him to save the trapeze for the post-season.
The Action Hero
A rare find, this guy has no problem putting it in the net on game day. Somehow he balances hot sex with stellar performance in the game. Other players will try to flatten him for being so sickeningly perfect, but he just shakes it off and puts it in again.
The Serial Shagger
He says yes to game day sex and if he wins that day, makes sexytime a critical part of his pre-game ritual. This may get complicated when he’s on the road. You’d better make sure you are traveling with him or someone else might be called in to cover your position.
UP NEXT – Live Female Friendly Commentary by Lena & Jules
Find out which players are locking it up or loving it down on game day:
NHL Playoffs April 26th @ 7pmET (teams TBD)
Listen LIVE at:
~where girl talk is a sport